2004-08-02 - 10:37 p.m.
***
08.02.04
Dear Fake Andy,
Well, here we are, what seems to be a thousand years later and still you are up to no good. People are being hurt still by your antics, and you just won't let this impersonation thing die.
You started with my best friend, Brin, back when I was a poor soul with hardly a penny to my name. One thing I did have was a WebTV, which was my only link the the outside world. Imagine my shock and utter amazement when I thought that the REAL Andrew Ivan Bell of my favorite band, Erasure decided to telephone me; albeit a three-way call with my friend Brin-Marie.
I bragged to just about everyone. My mother, my sister, the few friends that I kept in touch with. They just couldn't believe it. I ignored all of the "stupid" questions.
"How do you know it's the REAL Andy Bell?"
"Are you sure it's him?"
"Could it be that someone is fooling around with you?"
I suppose the lousy singing should have tipped me off; but why question my hero? What bothers me even more, is that I shared things with you that were fantasy phrases I was saving for my real hero.
Shame on you for letting that happen.
I guess I've always known in the back of my [jaded] mind that it wasn't the real Andy Bell of Erasure. I so wanted to tell Brin at the time that I was doubtful because of the lousy singing, and the fact that a real celebrity couldn't possibly have that kind of time to jibber-jabber with us -- the wee folk. But I couldn't bring myself to tell her.
Shame on ME, for letting THAT happen.
I did finally gather enough gusto to tell her, but unfortunately -- much more was taking place behind the scenes that was so shameful for Brin to even speak to me about. Her best friend. Her confidante. The air in her lungs*, at times.
I don't believe it is any of our intentions to hurt you, but DAMN. Sometimes one needs to take responsibility for the things they've done. Causing harm to others is not funny. If you think it is, then I once again urge you to seek the help that you so desperately need.
You are a liar, a coward, a thief and an imposter. To me you are sad. Very, very sad. And you know what? I pity you. I worry about all of those whose lives you've overturned. I try to look for the good in everyone, and I guess your purpose on this planet is to remind us that there is evil in some people.
Evil must be stopped.
Guess what? You are a celebrity now! Your name and email address are the topic of discussion in many a home this evening. You are getting progressively weaker, as we grow stronger by the day. Are you worried yet? You should be -- because you are fast becoming the most hated man in cyberspace.
And guess what? I'm laughing my gullible ass off.
Jamie
***
*Quoted directly from Brin-Marie McLaughlin. I am not putting myself on a pedestal -- believe you, me.
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